In honor of Valentine’s Day coming up this week, I wanted to share a little piece of research I found when I was writing my Master’s thesis on how food creates and sustains cultural identity.

I had been working on a research paper that explored cultural belief in aphrodisiacs and found a study out of Germany that claimed to be able to predict the bedroom habits of men based on how their wives described their eating habits! Immediately I thought this was fascinating and began talking about it with my friends and retroactively applying it to lovers I had had– and the rule seemed to apply!

In my upcoming lecture on Food, Culture and Ancestors, (oh and hey! It’s FREE) I’ll be talking more about how food– and dining together– creates romantic and familial bonds, which enhance our cultural identity. Yes, most cultures have a dating tradition around food and drinks. Yes, most cultures reinforce community bonds with community meals. But until I read this study, I had no idea that eating with someone could be telling you important and intimate details about whether or not you wanted to invite them in for a night cap. *wink wink*

But this Valentine’s Day, see if you can’t match up your partner’s eating habits with their love making style. If you’re dating, pay attention to what and how your date eats their meal and see what it does to your level of attraction for them. And don’t forget to tune into your own eating style! Are you projecting the right message?

Here are some scenarios to consider. None of these scenarios are right, wrong or ideal– it all depends on what you’re attracted to and what kind of mood you might be in on any given evening.

Does your date:

  • Carefully look over the menu, ask what’s fresh/the chef’s recommendation are?
  • Not even both to crack open the menu because he/she likes to eat the same thing over and over again?
  • Shovel their food in their mouth, barely tasting it before swallowing it?
  • Slowly savor the first bite and comment on the various flavors they’re picking up?
  • Eat painfully, irritatingly slow?
  • Carefully consider the wine and dessert pairings to make sure the ambiance is ideal?
  • Prefer to order take-out for Netflix and Chill?
  • Absentmindedly eat while scrolling on their phone?
  • Talk with their mouth full?
  • Put too much food in their mouth?
  • Seem afraid to eat/show any sign of an appetite
  • Have a bunch of rules around what they will and will not eat?
  • Not have enough rules around what they will and will not eat?

Let me know if you see yourself or your partner in any of these!

And don’t forget to register for the Food. Culture. Ancestors. Workshop taking place next month!